Day 1

ATHD-1

Day 1 – May 12, 2014

1/100 :} I love this wretched animal… #100happydays #Chopstick

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Day one is always the easiest. It’s easy to concede to a bad day and have the thought that maybe one should start trying to see the “other side” of life. Almost everyone has at least one very precious memory in their mind, or heart, or soul to pull out when the bottom seems just a few inches away from our feet. For me, it was this beast.

I started my “100 Happy Days” journey during the absolute most tumultuous time of my adult life, to date. Chopstick actually was a huge player in events that caused the crumble I was in, on May 12, 2014. He came to our home, unexpected, unwanted and with sneaky intentions. And his presence caused a lot of upheaval. Honestly, I *needed* him when he showed up. I had been feeling myself spiral deeper and faster by the day into a terrifying possibility of a depressive episode. I’m not particularly prone to depression, but I can get very overwhelmed at times. This particular Fall/Winter when he came to us was rough, and I had been feeling exceedingly alone – and mute – in the world. My partner & I (generally referred to as “Leprechaun” unless I drop his real name) had even talked about moving to a different/bigger place and getting a dog, because I think he realized that I just needed some sort of unconditional love of the type which he was then-unable to give to me.

And then Chopstick showed up. And The Leprechaun took offense (and even exhibited signs of jealousy at times!), but I was in love at first sight. The kids called him “theirs” but we all knew he was mine – or rather, I was his. My first “100 HD” picture is even a cheat, by the rules… It was taken the previous December. But I was so desperately lost and confused by the offerings of the world, that I couldn’t find anything else that day that made me happier than the memory of that day when my son took this picture.

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